(Dis)Orientation Week3 min read

Writing to you for the capital of skin cancer, beautiful Australia!

Yep, it’s true. I found out a couple days ago. Australia is also the continent with the most animals and plants that can kill you.  Lovely.  I’ve signed up to live in a death trap!

Nobody even warned me about the fact I should bring my scooter along (Link) as to evade all these hazards. I’m not even kidding! It seems everyone has a scooter here except me! I saw a horizontally gifted man riding one in a suit downtown today! The worst part is I’m not even making this up! Brisbane is crazy for scooters! This is probably where our old fads (Canada) come to die… I’ll keep on the lookout for Pokémon cards, yo-yo’s, crazy bones and magic cards and report any findings. Thankfully, none of the international students I met during orientation week had scooters. That would have been too much.

We got to kick off our arrival in Brisbane with the mandatory speeches restating everything that had been sent to us by e-mail. I’m never reading another e-mail ever again. Unless it’s from one of you fine readers out there that is… Thank god I met some Scotts or that day would have been a write off! Woot! Scotland! I wish I had that accent!

The next day we ended up partying on a boat because QUT wanted to remind us that we were fresh off the boat, as to put us back in our place! No but in all seriousness, the boat cruise was a riot!  After having spoken to a few people, I realized that Norway was the biggest delegation by far. When the limbo contest started up, I told myself there was Norway I was letting their delegation win this thing! Sadly, I lost when there were 3 people left and a Norwegian ended up taking the crown. I will defend our Canadian honor in the long run, promise.

Today, we were greeted with open arms by the New Farms Bowls Club. We were going to rock the turf; shoeless. Yes, they’ve added a need twist to a game we all love (or never heard of depending on the case…), barefoot lawn bowling. Basically, you throw a small ball about 15 meters away. You proceed to throw big balls at that small ball. Whoever gets the closest gets a point. Plus, YOU’RE NOT WEARING ANY SHOES!

I’m not going to lie, I got into it. I was ready to make T-shirts and start a team after half an hour. As for the rest of my team, they were not so keen. I took a breather to get over this fact when the Fin on my team asked me if I had ever been to his hometown, Helsinki. I told him: “No… But I have been to helfloaty!”. Suffice to say he was not amused… Nor was the rest of my team. I guess they just need more time to get me… Lesson learned: Don’t joke with Fins. They will think you’re flirting with them.

Tomorrow, I’m off on a 3 day orientation camp where I will tempt my hand at surfing; and most likely my feet; and the rest of my body too.

Australianly yours,

Joël

P.S. They had this really cool idea here. You know how some people walk into the screen door some times and break it (Not me, I never do that)? Well, every house in this fine city has a metal grill (visible) on the screen door. It keeps its functionality, adds a new one, and also gives the screen door a bit of personality. Think about it! I smell a North American business opportunity!

Last Updated on December 22, 2020 by Joël Collin-Demers